Scared
by katie1999
Summary: New world Zorro. Victoria becomes scared when Diego is severely injured during an attack and she is unable to cope with it. Just a short one dealing with the effects the attack has on Victoria.
1. Chapter 1

**Scared**

Chapter 1

Diego had offered to join Victoria on her way to Santa Paula where she wanted to go to the bank. It gave him the opportunity to spend some time with the woman he loved.

The attack from the bandits came as a surprise. "We need only the girl," he heard them say. "She will tell us the identity of Zorro after we had some fun with her."

"Only over my dead body," Diego challenged them in a controlled voice. Diego cursed himself for not having come as Zorro. Then he would have had his sword with him. He grabbed the whip from the wagon and pulled three bandits from their feet. From one of the men he drew a sword after he had knocked him out.

Afterwards Victoria couldn't tell anymore what had happened. The men had threatened her and Diego had fought with surprising agility. He nearly managed to defeat them all, but then there was a shot from behind.

"Victoria," he had cried out and she had seen the look in his eyes before he fell to the ground.

Victoria had screamed as he went down. She had grabbed a pistol from the ground and without aiming she had shot at the men. She hadn't hit them but a little later Mendoza and his men had arrived. They had been patrolling in the area and come to their rescue when they heard the shooting. The soldiers had arrested the fleeing bandits and Mendoza had taken care of the rest.

When Mendoza arranged for Diego to be taken to the hacienda, she hadn't been able to say anything. While the doctor treated Diego, Alejandro had asked her what had happened.

"Zorro, he didn't come," she cried, pulling at her hair, "Zorro didn't come." Alejandro realized that she was under shock. He insisted she stayed at the hacienda though she wanted to return to the tavern. "Zorro will come to the tavern to see if I'm alright, won't he?" she sobbed, covering her face with her hands.

"Victoria, you're under shock, you can't return to the tavern in your state. But I'm sure Zorro will find a way to see you, no matter where you are."

Alejandro couldn't understand why she was so obsessed with seeing Zorro when it was Diego who was severely injured.

But how could he understand when he hadn't seen Diego fighting for her. She clung to the idea that Diego wasn't Zorro. It just couldn't be. If Zorro was someone else, it would mean that he was safe and that the man she loved so deeply wasn't on the verge of dying in the room next door, because he had saved her life. But she had seen his eyes when she had tried to stop the bleeding while he was lying in her lap soaking her skirt with his blood. She'd never forget the way he had looked at her. But it couldn't be. He couldn't be dying. Not him. She loved him and she couldn't live without him.

A glass was pressed into her shaking hands and the doctor told her to drink the bitter tasting medicine. She didn't care at all and without resistance she let a maid take care of her. The maid stripped her of her blood soaked clothes, washed her and put her to bed. She was already asleep from the potion when the doctor looked for her again a little later.

Alejandro stayed at the side of his son's bed, praying for his life. Diego had lost a lot of blood and the doctor had done all he could, but he stayed at the hacienda to check on his patient's condition and change the dressings. The shot itself had missed vital organs, but the loss of blood could kill him. Fortunately his patient was in a better physical condition then most. There was still hope that he might survive.

Z Z Z

It was a lonely night for Alejandro while he kept vigil over his son. From what he heard from Mendoza, one of the bandits had confessed that they wanted to kidnap Victoria and when Diego had started to defend themselves, he had been shot.

"Diego, my son, how could that happen to you? When you're never involved in a fight?"

Alejandro didn't understand what had happened. Victoria hadn't been able to tell much. He had never seen her in such a state before. The events had shocked her utterly and the doctor had thought it best to have her put to bed with a sleeping potion.

The next morning she appeared to be calm again, asking him about Diego and when she heard that there wasn't any change, she showed no emotion. Alejandro wanted her to stay and recover, but she insisted on returning to the tavern.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

At the tavern she tried to concentrate on her work, but her helpers soon noticed that she hadn't overcome the shock from the events yet. She was lost in thoughts and when Pilar entered the kitchen unnoticed by her, she frightened and dropped the dishes. Shaking she stared at the broken fragments on the floor without making any move to pick them up.

Everything in the kitchen reminded her of Zorro and the times he had come to see her. She wanted him to visit her right now and kiss her, even for a brief moment. Then she would know that he was alright and not close to death in his bed.

At siesta time she couldn't stand it any longer. She needed to see Diego, how he was doing and she needed proof that he was really Zorro. Before she left for the de la Vega hacienda, she went up to her room and packed the two things that bound her closely to Zorro, the engagement ring and the mask he had given her.

"Victoria," Alejandro was surprised to have her come back so soon.

"How is Diego? I'm sorry, Don Alejandro if you got the impression that I don't care, but I do care." Alejandro noticed her shaking hands. "If you need someone to sit by his bed and relieve you, I'm here."

"That's really nice of you, Victoria. I could use some sleep in my own bed, after sitting in this chair most of the night. Felipe has taken his turn and I have sent him off to bed."

"How is Diego?" Victoria repeated anxiously, trying to hide her state by keeping her hands behind her back.

"He's very weak from his loss of blood. The doctor isn't sure he will make it." Alejandro was depressed.

"Has he been awake?"

"From time to time he opened his eyes and said something unintelligible. I'm not sure if he was really conscious or not. I know you were very upset yesterday, Victoria, but can you tell me today what happened during the attack?"

Victoria searched for words and when she thought of the fight, she began to relive the nightmare again. How Diego had fought the men, making her realize that he was the man she loved. And in the moment she had finally found him, he had been shot and now she was going to lose him and her best friend at the same time.

"Everything happened so fast, Don Alejandro, I'm sorry," Victoria stumbled over the words and began to cry.

"I'm sorry, Victoria, I didn't want to upset you again, I only want to understand how he got shot." Alejandro realized that it was of no use to ask Victoria anything about the incident. "Do you really feel good enough to take a vigil at Diego's side?" He was concerned about her.

"It's alright, Don Alejandro, it will help me relax," she lied. "I need to do something and I want to help."

Alejandro was inclined to believe her and left her at Diego's side while she started to moisten his dry lips with a wet cloth. As soon as Alejandro had left her alone, she pulled the black mask out of her bag and unfolded it. She laid it over his face, just the way Zorro used to wear his mask. Standing up, she looked down at his partly covered face. There was no mistake when she looked at him. He featured the same jaw line as Zorro and his mouth was the same too. She didn't need him to open his eyes and look into his blue ones to be absolutely sure who he was. He was Zorro.

Retrieving the mask from his face she put it back in her bag and looked at her finger where she wore her engagement ring. She clasped his hand in a tight grip and tried to keep her tears at bay. "Please," she whispered, "please don't die. You can't leave me alone. You gave me a promise that we'd be married some day. Please, I love you." Holding his hand to her breast she began to cry wetting his fingers with her tears.

But all her praying didn't change a thing. The beating of his heart was still fast and irregular while he was breathing quickly with only shallow intakes.

How long could he survive that until all power left his body? All she could do was to make him sip small amounts of water and wait by his side.

Alejandro found her dozing in the chair while holding Diego's hand in her lap when he came into the room to change places with her.

Alejandro touched her slightly at the shoulder and she looked at him bleary-eyed. "How is he, Victoria?"

"Still the same, fighting for his life." She looked at his unconscious form and wished for him to wake up. Just to have him open his eyes and look at her again. To see the love in his eyes. How could he still love her, after all the things she said to him when she compared him to Zorro. No wonder he had been afraid to remove his mask.

"Victoria, you should take some rest too," Alejandro looked at her concerned. "You're still very pale and I don't think you have fully recovered from yesterday."

"I'm fine," she protested. But then she threw herself in his arms. "He will be alright, won't he?" Alejandro put an arm around her, offering her some comfort. "It's not sure yet, Victoria." He ran with his fingers through his hair. "I still can't understand how it happened. Diego was never involved in any fighting, he should have known that he didn't have a chance against those bandits. Why did he even try?" The worry for his only son had engraved deep lines into his face.

Victoria stared at him, realizing that his father didn't know. She had somehow assumed that Zorro had someone who helped him and thought that it must be his father, but he wasn't.

Had Diego kept the secret to himself, taking it upon him all alone, enduring all the hurtful remarks from everyone? The prospect made it even worse.

She put her hands in her face to hide her tears before she ran out of the room. She hadn't no idea how she could cope with it and wandered aimlessly around, until she stopped in the garden of the hacienda.

She unfolded the mask from her bag again and touched the soft cloth. The same satin cloth as his shirt that she had felt under her hands each time he had taken her in his arms and kissed her.

She would never forget the evening they had shared their first kiss. She had recovered enough from being shot to walk around and then he had been standing there, unnoticed by her at first. He had suggested her to marry Diego, but she hadn't understood. Instead she had thrown herself in his arms and they had kissed until he had reluctantly let her go because his father had been calling for him. Later she had found his mask at the wall. Why hadn't she made the connection earlier?

Diego had told her once that he loved a woman who was in love with another man. Was that how he perceived it? That she only loved the legend and not the man? How had he managed to play the double role for such a long time?

Putting her fingers through the eye holes in the mask she remembered his blue eyes who had always shown his feelings for her so vividly. Through his eyes she had looked into his soul and she knew now that he had hidden much more of himself when he hadn't worn a black mask.

She didn't know how long she had stayed there in the garden. "Victoria, Victoria?" Alejandro was calling for her. Coming out of her thoughts, she quickly put back the mask and she also remembered to take off the ring she had worn while keeping vigil. Unintentionally the stone was turned to the inside so Alejandro couldn't have recognized it earlier.

"Ah, there you are." Alejandro spotted her on a bench in the shades. "The doctor just checked on Diego and he told me that he has improved a little. So there is hope yet that he will make it."

"Thank you, Don Alejandro, for telling me." Victoria managed a small smile. So there was hope, but hope wasn't enough. He could still die. She wouldn't give in to hope until she knew for sure.

"Do you want to come in, Victoria? It's been some time since you had something to eat."

"I'm not hungry, Don Alejandro," she replied, but nonetheless she followed him inside.

Alejandro looked at her pale blank face. He had hoped she'd be happy to hear the news, but she showed no emotion. If he hadn't seen her tears earlier, he'd think she didn't care. How could she stay so emotionless?

Victoria went to Diego's room to look for him. Though it wasn't much, there was a slight change to be seen. His breathing seemed to be slower and deeper. "Please, wake up," she whispered, "don't leave me!" She caressed his cheek that felt unusual cold to her touch.

On Alejandro's insistence she stayed for dinner, but it was a quiet meal. Neither Victoria nor Alejandro were in the mood to talk much when their thoughts were with Diego and Felipe was at Diego's side. Victoria barely managed to eat the soup while she looked at the empty seat where Diego used to sit at dinner. Everything around her reminded her of Diego and without his presence she felt empty inside. Some drops of tomato soup on the table-cloth brought back the image of Diego's blood soaking his white shirt and how she had tried to stop the bleeding.

Someone took the spoon out of her shaking hand and put it back on the plate. When she looked up she saw Alejandro standing beside her chair.

"It's alright, Victoria," Alejandro said gently, " You're still under shock."

"I'm sorry," she cried, "there was so much blood. It was so terrible. I can't eat anymore. I'd rather go to bed if you excuse me."

"Do you need another potion to help you sleep?"

"Thank you, Don Alejandro. I'll try without one first."

Alejandro looked at her concerned as she slowly went to the room she had already occupied last night. He had thought that she had overcome the shock already, but she seemed to be completely shaken though she had looked so calm earlier. He couldn't understand why she was so out of her mind now. Normally she was a tough woman who wasn't so easily frightened even when she had been attacked in the tavern or kidnapped before.

A maid who had been sent to look for Victoria alarmed him to come to her room. Crying helplessly Victoria was sitting on the floor with her knees up to her chin, clutching her bag.

"Victoria, you need to sleep and relax," Alejandro tried to get through to her. "It will help you to get over the shock." Felipe vanished from the room, only to return a few minutes later with a small cup he pressed in her hands.

"That's cactus tea," Victoria exclaimed after she had tasted it. "I had that before. It made me so sleepy."

"Diego takes it sometimes when he can't sleep," Alejandro explained. "Felipe makes it for him."

Victoria looked at Felipe and she knew then who was Zorro's accomplice. At her questioning look Felipe nodded slightly.

"Drink it all and the maid will help you to go to bed. Tomorrow we'll talk again."

"Thank you," Victoria mumbled already getting sleepy from the tea.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Felipe and Alejandro took turns at Diego's bedside and they noticed with relief how Diego's condition improved during the night. He even opened his eyes regaining consciousness for brief moments without saying anything.

Z Z Z

The next day Victoria wanted to do vigil at Diego's bed though Alejandro was very reluctant about it. "Victoria, first of all you should take care of yourself. You haven't recovered yet."

"Please, Don Alejandro, I need to do something. I don't know if I can work again today and sitting by Diego's bed is at least something useful. It's not that straining when he is on the mend."

Since she was insistent about it, he let her sit by Diego's bed. "Felipe will come later to relieve you, Victoria. And if you want to talk, I'm here."

"Thank you, Don Alejandro," Victoria smiled a little.

As soon as she was alone with Diego she took his hand again, placing a kiss on it. Then she put her head on his chest to listen to his heartbeat. Tears of relief ran down her cheeks when she felt the slow and steady beat of his heart.

"Don't cry," she felt a hand touch her hair.

"Diego," she exclaimed surprised, "You're awake!"

Before he could say anything more she kissed his lips. With surprising strength he responded to the kiss, opening her lips with his tongue to start an exploration of her mouth.

When they parted again, his lips curved up to a smile that lightened up his eyes.

"You're supposed to be too weak for that from your loss of blood," she chided him.

"You just sped up my recovery," he grinned. He started to choke and she saw the effort it took him to speak as he paled. With his hand he reached out to touch her face, but missed the strength to lift his arm high enough. His hand fell powerless to the side of his head.

"I'm here," Victoria whispered and lay her face on his hand on the pillow. "Don't use up your strength." She cupped his cheek with one hand while facing each other and he smiled before he fell asleep again.

Victoria stayed some time with her head on the pillow beside him, but Diego didn't wake up again until Felipe came to relieve her.

Z Z Z

Diego's health was improving during the next days and he could sit up in his bed again and have a longer talk, but he needed to stay in bed for a while longer.

When Diego didn't sleep, it was either Alejandro or Victoria and of course Felipe who kept him company in his conscious moments. Victoria hardly left Diego's side and Alejandro was surprised how close the two of them suddenly were. He had even caught them kissing once, but since Diego was still very weak and couldn't do much there was no reason to keep them apart.

"Diego, what about you and Victoria?" he asked his son in a quiet moment. "I must say I'm a bit concerned about Victoria."

"Why's that, Father?" Diego asked curiously.

"When you were attacked she got a severe shock and she wasn't able to tell what really happened. She only complained that Zorro hadn't been there for the rescue and was frantic to see him. That's why she returned to her tavern the next day."

"She asked for Zorro?" Diego asked incredulously.

"Yes, she was completely shaken. I thought she had gotten over it the next day, but she hadn't. I'm not sure if she has recovered yet."

"That's why you're concerned, Father?"

"I'm not sure if her sudden dedication to you is not a result of her feeling guilty that you got shot while defending her. And once she has overcome it, she returns to Zorro. I don't want you to get hurt, son."

"I'm sure that won't happen, Father, but I'll talk with her."

Z Z Z

When Victoria visited him later, Diego eyed her critically and noticed how strained she looked.

"What's wrong, Victoria?" Diego asked her, running his fingers through her hair after she had bent down to share a passionate kiss. "I'm feeling much better and I'm not going to die anymore. You should be happy and relax again."

"I'm alright, Diego," Victoria affirmed, but Diego knew her too well.

"That's not true Victoria," Diego contradicted her, "so tell me what bothers you. My father told me that you were out of your mind after I was shot and that you were calling for Zorro to come. But I know that you found out who I am during the fight or you wouldn't have kissed me when I woke up. Why call for Zorro when you knew that I was him?"

Victoria began to cry. "I just couldn't stand it to lose you. I only wished Zorro to be someone else so I wouldn't lose you and Zorro at the same time. Please, Diego, don't leave me. I can't live without you." Sobbing she sank into his arms.

"It's alright, querida, I'm here. You won't lose me anymore." Diego stroked her hair, holding her tight while she kept on crying. He understood that she was utterly scared from nearly losing him and that it would take some time until she overcame the shock.

Z Z Z

Their engagement was no surprise in the pueblo to all who had seen Victoria shift her love from Zorro to Diego, after Diego had nearly died. Victoria explained that she had only now realized how much Diego meant to her when she had been about to lose him.

That was probably the reason Zorro no longer came to the pueblo after he had lost his love to Don Diego.

But it had been Victoria who kept him from riding as Zorro. First of all Diego needed time to recover enough to go riding again. The doctor told him not to put any strain on the side where he had been injured or the wound might break up again. So he had to stick to a carriage until he was healed.

He saw Victoria's relief when she heard he wouldn't be riding as Zorro any time soon. To imagine him facing the garrison all alone scared her now when she hadn't given it much thought before.

"I'm sorry, Diego, but I don't know if I can ever face that again," Victoria turned pale at the memory and Diego put an arm around her, gently pulling her tight. "I don't want to see you lying in your blood once more. Now I know how easily a shot can kill you, even if you're the best swordsman in California. I can't get that picture out my mind and it scares me to death."

"There won't be any reason for Zorro to come into the pueblo when you're here at the hacienda and married to me. And while I wait for my injury to heal, the caballeros will have to find other ways to deal with the alcalde instead of relying on Zorro." Diego kissed her tenderly and he knew that his days as Zorro were finished. Now that she knew his identity, he couldn't ask her to wait patiently at home for Zorro without knowing if he returned at all.

She would never be able to cope with it, because she loved him too much to face the prospect of losing him.

Z Z Z

The wedding took place a few weeks later as soon as the doctor declared Diego fully healed again.

After the wedding Diego led his wife into the library and slipped with her into the cave. "I have a wedding gift for you, Victoria," Diego smiled at her.

"Another one, Diego?" Victoria asked surprised. "But you already gave me that necklace."

On the desk in the cave was a small box that felt very light when she lifted it. Inside she saw some black cloth and it unfolded as two pieces with eye holes in. "Your masks, Diego?" she asked him questioningly.

"My mask and my spare one too," he confirmed. "As long as you have them, I can't ride as Zorro."

"You're giving up Zorro for me?" Victoria asked him incredulously. And when he nodded, he thought he hadn't seen her smile so happily since the day he had been shot. "This is the best wedding gift of all!" She leaped into his arms to kiss him and he knew he had made the right decision.

The END


End file.
